15:28, April 15 11 0 usmagazine.com

2019-04-15 15:28:04

 

Bebe Rexha Tells Fans She's Bipolar: 'I'm Not Ashamed Anymore'

Revealing her truth. Bebe Rexha confessed to fans via Twitter that she suffers from bipolar disorder.

“For the longest time, I didn’t understand why I felt so sick,” she began a series of tweets on Monday, April 15. “Why I felt lows that made me not want to leave my house or be around people and why I felt highs that wouldn’t let me sleep, wouldn’t let me stop working or creating music. Now I know why.”

The “I’m a Mess” songstress, 29, said a mental illness has been at the crux of her symptoms. “I’m bipolar and I’m not ashamed anymore. That is all. (Crying my eyes out),” she wrote.

The Grammy nominee went on to say that she’ll be using her health issues as inspiration for her musical career. “This next album will be favorite album ever because I’m not holding anything back,” she wrote. “I love you all very much. And I hope you accept me as I am.”

The musician previously opened up about her struggles with anxiety to Teen Vogue. “I cry a lot. It’s tough. I have my own therapist and I have people I talk to,” she told the magazine in June. “It’s an everyday battle, I feel. I don’t wanna feed into it, but my lifestyle is so crazy.”

Even prior to hitting it big, Rexha said she could recall feeling overwhelmed. “When I first went to my first year of college, I was so intense. I didn’t know how to handle it and be around people. I was super anxious all the time. I was anxious when I was a little girl, I just didn’t know what it was,” the musician recalled. “Finally, when I figured it out, I was like, ‘Oh. Finally, I understand. I have anxiety.'”

Now, Rexha faces outside pressure from her industry — and society: She recently admitted to being upset by designers who declined to dress her for the 2019 Grammys. “I love my body, I’m a curvy girl, and that’s why I put it up because I was actually really hurt when I found out,” she said during an appearance on Britain’s Lorraine on April 5. “I had been nominated for two Grammys, it’s, like, my moment. My parents are flying out and I was excited to wear something beautiful. I wanted to feel like a princess.”

The New York native initially slammed the clothing companies that refused her requests for ensembles in an Instagram video in January. “You’re saying that all the women in the world that are size 8 and up are not beautiful, and they cannot wear your dresses,” she said in the clip. “So all the people that said that I’m thick and I can’t wear dresses? F–k you, I don’t want to wear your f–-king dresses.”

Still, she’s trying to focus on the positive in her life: The “Meant to Be” singer thanked her fans for their support ahead of her mental health admission in an Instagram video on Sunday, April 14. “I’m trying to be more grateful bc sometimes you can get caught up in the number on the weighing scale and the number in your bank account and the chart positions and you can get super competitive,” she said. “I don’t want to be caught in my life like that, so today I’m grateful for all my fans.”

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